I know Halloween is a little controversial.

But I have got to say, I like it.

I don’t so much care for the dressing up part. But I am a huge fan of the gathering with friends and family, strolling around the suburbs, meeting neighbors, and eating candy…a lot of candy.

I think we need more holidays that encourage to turn off the television, get out of our houses, and be in community.

Here are some of my favorite pictures from this Halloween.

How cute are these kids all decked out? Even Molly was feeling festive. (Yes, Target got the best of me again. I have no shame. My poor dog.)

How did you celebrate “Halloween”?

Did you attend Catalyst last month? And come home feeling all warm, fuzzy and inspired? But quickly stash away your swag bag and your notes? Only to get immersed back into life as usual?

Or did something (finances, obligations, lack of vacation time) keep you at home? So you watched the seeminglingly-never-ending twitter feed and thought to yourself, “maybe next year?”

If so, you need to hear about a new initiative Catalyst is working on…Catalyst Connect.

Catalyst Connect from Catalyst on Vimeo.

Catalyst is creating intentional and strategic space for you to continue your leadership journey in relationships with those you already trust. Beginning in 2011, Catalyst will launch smaller, more intimate coaching huddles of ~5 other like minded leaders AND regional round table conversations of ~70 local leaders purposed towards facilitating conversation, collaboration, and long term leadership development. We will also encourage and support open source “meet ups” driven and championed by local Catalyst ambassadors. You are the Catalyst in your community, we want to support you and help connect you with other trusted leaders…

Pretty cool, huh?

I sure think so. I have been in one of the trial coaching huddles and it is has been one of the best things I have ever done. No lie, one of the best things I have ever done. I could go on and on about our coach, the group of people I huddle with, the invaluable (albeit painful at times) insight they offer. But I will save that for another post. Right now I want to talk about the meet ups.

On Thursday, November 4, Catalyst is having the official Catalyst Meetup Day. The hope is that we can connect with other local leaders and continue the conversation around “Tension.”

If you are in Nashville, hope you will come out and join us at 7 PM at Cantina Laredo (now, what is a meetup without table side guacamole and a margarita?) Click here for more information.

And for the non-Nashvillians, check out the meetup page to find or start a Catalyst meetup near you.

Do you struggle with taking conference experiences back to real life? If not, what have you done to make the learning, the inspiration, stick?

Growing up fall was always my favorite season. Back to school, high school football games, homecoming dances, hot chocolate, apple cider, warm chocolate chip cookies, pumpkin patches, Halloween, Thanksgiving, corduroy pants, blue jeans, bulky sweaters, pea coats, burnt orange foliage, the Texas Longhorns…what was there not to like?

But these days fall is more of a struggle for me.

Everywhere I look, signs of winter are imminent.

Temperatures are falling.

Leaves are changing.

Daylight is shrinking.

And I each time I enjoy a meal alfresco (yep, that’s a kind of fancy way of saying outside, and I’m fancy), a sunset on my drive home, a sunny Sunday afternoon walk, I can’t help but wonder if it will be my last.

Or at least my last until Spring.

Anyone else bothered by how the signs of fall all remind us of it’s inevitable end? Or is this just early onset of seasonal affective disorder?

I’ll admit it. This is sort of a cop-out on a blog post. After all I have already tweeted this Catalyst video from Catalyst TWICE. But I can not stop thinking about this message from Francis Chan.

Catalyst East 2010: Francis Chan from Catalyst on Vimeo.

And I am processing Francis’ questions.

What is “weird”?

When they look at us what is going to be the “weirdness” about our generation?

When I look at scripture does my life “make sense”?

Do I live like I want my life to fit in Bible one day?

How about you?

By far this is the best, the most-thought provoking thing that I’ve read all week. Since I first read Blue Like Jazz, I have appreciated Donald Miller’s voice, his humor, and his insight. I’ve credited his most recent book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years with changing the way I think. A few years ago, life was about getting it done as effortlessly, painlessly, and comfortably as possible. Now I have the end in mind, what kind of story do I want to have lived?

“Do You Have a Good Team of Life Editors?” made me see that I can not create the kind of story I want to live alone. I need people, trustworthy God-honoring people, holding me accountable to my dreams, my purpose. I need friends who are willing to speak hard truth into my life. I need an extra set of eyes to see into my big gaping blind spots. I need life editors. Go read his post.

PS – The Second Best Thing I’ve Read This Week is this incredible story from Carlos Whittaker. All I can say about it is…wow.

Two questions.

One: How are your life editors helping you live a better story?

Two: What is the best thing you’ve read this week?

If you were truly FEARLESS, what is ONE THING you would commit to DOING right now?

Skydive?

Break a habit?

Tell someone how you really feel?

Step into the spotlight?

Run a marathon?

Change careers?

Give a long overdue apology?

Say goodbye to a friend that is stunting your growth?

Adopt a child?

Looking at this short list, I am amazed by how my fear has limited me, how my fear has held me back. Ugh.

A couple of friends and I have this shared mental list (yeah, I’m not sure how we do it either) of WORDS WE HATE. Words that makes us cringe. Words that should be avoided if at all possible.

I thought it was time to commit this list to paper so I will start us out and then you can chime in with words you feel should be added and why they make your skin crawl. (Oh yeah, let’s keep all the naughty words out of this. Let’s all just assume that we all know better than to use those. To say it a little more strongly: I will edit out any words that I feel are inappropriate.)

Moist – Let’s stick with DAMP people.

Lover – Really? Lover? Ugh. The worst is when someone refers to their spouse as lover. I don’t need to hear that. Ear muffs.

Bro – I just think Bro is lame. And this is my list, on my blog, so it will stay.

Mayonnaise – Just something about the way “mayonaise” sounds as it rolls off the tongue. Yuck.

Ointment – Kind of like mayonaise, it just sounds icky.

Okay, your turn. Remember, keep it clean…

Recently a friend (that I think the world of) pointed out that there are times when I suddenly, inexplicably, vanish.

And only a shell remains.

She cited a specific incident that morning and challenged me,

What happened?

You were so alive, so vibrant, so engaged, and all of sudden, you disappeared?

Where is your fight???

Ever since her questions have haunted me and I can’t help but wonder,

Am I like a turtle that at the first sign of danger retreats into the comfort of my shell?

Why don’t I really battle it out in passionate pursuit of my dreams?

What am I afraid of?

And most importantly, how can I break this unbecoming cycle?

Because I have got to say of all the animals I could possibly imitate, the turtle would have to be 0ne of my last choices.

What animal do you feel you resemble and why?

I am 34. And single.

So the question has been posed a time or two by friends, family, and complete strangers,

Are you too picky? Perhaps? Just a little? Too picky?

Honestly, I don’t know the answer to that one.

I know that I have finally stopped looking for a younger George Clooney, the captain of the football team, or the king of the frat house.

And I know that I have three things that are non-negotiables. (No, they aren’t a full head of hair, a six-pack, or a European luxury sedan.) They are as simple as this. I am looking for someone who is kind, strong, and funny.

Kind. I want someone who genuinely cares for others. And by others I mean not just those that it is convenient to love. I want someone who purposely builds into those around him. I want someone who chooses his words carefully and speaks gently even when having “tough conversations”.

Strong. I want someone who is protective of what is good and what is right. I want someone who makes me feel safe. I want someone who is confident in who he is and is passionately pursuing what God has called him to. I want someone who will challenge me to be the best version of myself. And I want (okay, maybe I don’t so much want this as need it) someone who will put me in my place (sometimes I can be a little too sassy for my own good).

Funny. I want someone who makes me laugh until I cry. I want someone who encourages me to be freakishly silly. I want someone who can enjoy Christmas, Disneyland, and adventures with pure unadulterated child-like joy.

If those three non-negotiables are too much to ask for, then I am will continue on finding contentment in the single life.

Maybe I am just too picky?

Curious.

Singles: Would you consider yourself picky? What are the three most important qualities you want in a future partner? Be honest.

Marrieds: What were you looking for? What did you find?

A couple of months ago, I had the opportunity to join a handful of bloggers on an absolutely-amazing-once-in-a-lifetime-kind-of trip. We flew out to sunny Los Angeles, stayed in some super swanky digs (oh how I love W Hotels), and rolled around Hollywood in a white Hummer that stretched as long as a football field. We mixed and mingled at a rooftop reception overlooking the Hollywood Hills.

Fancy, huh? And that’s not even the half of it.

We screened Secretariat on the Disney lot. You know the Disney lot? Where the Disney movies are made?

We met Randall Wallace. Randall Wallace who is the director of Secretariat who wrote and/or directed blockbusters like Braveheart, We Were Soldiers, and Pearl Harbor. Randall Wallace who is hands down one of the most interesting people I have ever met.

All this to say…it was an incredible trip. Thank you, Different Drummer.

But the highlight on the trip was definitely the movie.

Secretariat is full of hope. Secretariat is the kind of movie that makes you laugh and makes you cry.  Secretariat is the kind of movie that causes you to break into applause in the movie theater. Secretariat is the kind of movie that reminds you that there are things in life worth fighting for.

So would you do me a favor and go see it? Gather up your family and friends this weekend and treat yourself to an afternoon, or evening, at the movies. You won’t regret it.

And just because you have seen one movie about a horse doesn’t mean you have seen them all!

Here’s are some fun pictures from my trip:

Here’s Ken Coleman asking Randall Wallace a little more about the heroine Penny Chenery:

And here’s the trailer:

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Have you seen Secretariat? What were your thoughts on the movie?