The Most Important Place for Honesty, Sheila Walsh

Posted By on Feb 15, 2011 in The Life I Live | 57 comments


I am so excited to have Sheila Walsh guest posting today. I love Sheila Walsh. It is rare that a day goes by that I don’t laugh out loud at something that she posts on twitter. Everyone should follow Sheila because she is hilarious. But Sheila is also poignant, insightful, brave and boldly honest. A powerful combination. Which she uses for good. Sheila Walsh is the author of numerous books including The Shelter of God’s Promises.

I love that Lindsey has made honesty her word for the year. On the news, via twitter, in person, on stage – the truth can be hard to nail down. But lately I’ve been struck again by perhaps the most important place for honesty and truth: in our own minds and hearts.

I don’t think we consciously mean to lie to ourselves, but we do it all the time: I’m not good enough, no one loves me, my life doesn’t matter

Over the years I have believed an ocean of lies. But I’ve found it usually starts with just one. As I allow that lie to seep into my thinking, it distorts everything else and soon I find myself in a storm where I can’t trust my own perspective.

There’s only one absolutely reliable antidote: God’s Word. The Hebrew words we translate as “promise” actually meant “to say” or “to speak.” In other words, God doesn’t need the word “promise” as His word is enough. If everything we said were true, there would be no need for us to “promise,” either. In reality, that only works with God. When God says something, it is true. No exaggeration, no twisting, no unhealthy agenda. He cannot lie, so His Word is truth and you can stake your life on it.

So that’s where I’m trying to train my gaze this year: on His truth, not mine.

What lies do you find slipping into your thinking when you least expect it?

What truths or promises do you cherish when that happens?

If you would like to win a copy of The Shelter of God’s Promises, simply leave a comment answering one of the questions above. I will randomly choose 5 commenters on Friday and will notify them via email.

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  • http://shawncornett.wordpress.com Shawn Cornett

    Simply let your `Yes’ be `Yes,’ and your`No,’ `No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.
    – Matthew 5:37 (NIV). Great post by Shelia today!

    • Sheila

      Thanks Shawn:)

    • Sheila

      Thanks Shawn:)

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  • Candysargent

    Actually “STOP!” the activity in my head, the mulling over & over, the Plan B..C..D as if..if God doesn’t come thru. I stop. Surrender. Wait. Now.

  • Crayonwrangler

    Great post!

    What lies do you find slipping into your thinking when you least expect it? – That was is within me is not strong enough to handle what is coming at me.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      I struggle with this one too. Lately when I feel this way I’ve been listening to Let the Waters Rise. It reminds me that I am strong enough with Him.

  • Mrs. D

    wow, never thought of those ‘thoughts’ as lies, always thought I was having trouble facing the truth when I said those things. As someone said, ‘God dosen’t make junk’ and I need to remember to depend on Him to see things as they really are and rely on Him to guide me along. Thanks Sheila and Lindsey for this perspective!

  • Dana

    Q. What lies do you find slipping into your thinking when you least expect it?
    A. That I am unloved, alone, insignificant, forgotten by God.

    Q. What truths or promises do you cherish when that happens?
    A. Psalms 139 in its entirety

  • Teresa

    When I am around a group of popular, beautiful women in varying social situations, I let the old lies slip in to my head. You know the ones, I am old, fat, ugly or whatever it is that makes me feel like I cannot compete with this group on this superficial level. I have to remind myself that God created me to be who I am and that He loves me. I have many things to offer that are more than skin deep. I also remind myself that even these popular, beautiful people have their own lies they believe and that makes me remember that we are all human and valuable to Him who created us!

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      i think we all do that…or at least i certainly do.

    • http://www.sheilawalshblog.com Sheila

      That is so true Teresa-our enemy is a liar and it’s so easy to believe his lies

      • Teresa

        Well, that was learned by reading your books and others who are like minded – Beth Moore and Danna Demetre. Thanks for the comment, though! I love your books and have seen you at Bayside Granite Bay, CA. You have a beautiful voice!

  • Roni

    I am living the lies right now. I am worthless, I am a burden, my live has no value… As much as I wish these were lies, they feel so true. I want out if this life.

    • Lori G.

      I spent many years feeling this way, Roni. I even tried suicide a couple of times—But the truth is, God made us exactly the way He wants us, and He doesn’t make mistakes!!! Please look to His word for the truth–He has great plans for you!!!

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      I am praying for you right now. I hope that you learn to believe that you are “beautifully and wonderfully made” and that God has a purpose just for you.

      • Roni

        I signed a safety contract with my therapist this morning. She is a wonderful Christian counselor. I am blessed to have her in my life! Thank you for your encouragement!

  • http://www.ordinarilyextraordinary.com/ amykiane

    I have always struggled with that voice that tells me I’m not good enough..

  • Myshell7777

    That I’m not smart enough. Pretty enough.That my husband will grow tired of me.

  • Peggy

    The voice that says God doesn’t really love me — but my word for the year is Believe so I am combating it by believing God’s Word.

  • Lori G.

    I have always struggled with the feeling of not being good enough–deep self hatred. When I focus on God and not me, I feel much better!!

  • Anonymous

    I wrote about this last week. My lie or go to bad feeling word is worthless and it sparks a fire from there if I don’t douse it with some life water quickly. It’s amazing how quickly it can take over and singe every part of life, our hearts, and minds. I’ve found that my memory verses are what help me combat it. That and prayer. If we ask for the Lord to stomp out the lies, He will.

    Blessings,
    Mel
    Please feel free to stop by: Trailing After God

  • http://smartstrongsexy.blogspot.com Brooke F

    “i’ll never have anything nice because i don’t deserve it” has to frequently be countered with “every good and perfect gift is from above” and HE has given me more than my fair share of gifts.

  • McMamma

    Because of childhood sexual abuse delivered from the hand of a same sex abuser, on my darkest days I fall into a pit of lies that scream at me that I don’t have what it takes to be a good wife, mother, lover. The truth is much different. God has given and trusts me with a devoted husband, a beautiful and fun 3 year old girl, 21 month old, energentic, identical twin girls, and another little one on the way. Staying in his word and taking him AT his word is what trumps the lie(s) every time. Thank you, Sheila for your constant transparency. One day in heaven, I hope to sit down for a girl chat over coffee, tea, or whatever it is they serve there. : )

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Love this “Staying in his word and taking him AT his word is what trumps the lie(s) every time.”

    • Sheila

      I woud love that!!:)

    • Pamkumpe

      I’m a twin, can I come to tea too?

  • http://www.pamkumpe.com Pam Kumpe

    I used to sit on the top of the playground slide as a child to hide from an abusive babysitter. Sometimes, when life gets tough and I stumble back up the ladder of despair (when reminders of unworthiness come my way), I find myself back on the slide where I can hide, thinking I’m too dirty or unworthy. (Satan’s lie of – unworthiness).
    However, the transforming love of knowing Jesus (through Peter) reached down to the lame man at the Gate Beautiful with his right hand is the same hand of hope he brings to me. The verse: Jeremiah 29:11 ~ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future; those are my lifeline to sliding with joy into the day.
    When I claim this promise, I kick my feet, let go of the top of the slide — and swoosh, I standing on firm ground and playing like God’s kid, with confidence and the wind brushing across my face is His breath of love running alongside me.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      that verse helps remind me to hope…

  • Raina

    I frequently find a few lies popping into my thoughts. I’m not good enough. I’m not lovable. I’m not pretty enough……..even just I’m not enough. The rational part of my brain knows those are lies that stem from my abused past (I was abused by many, and even abused myself by turning anorexic because I thought I should have been able to stop it), but in the middle of the storms you’re rarely rational. Or at least, I’m not. :) I’m still a work in progress. Probably will be until the day I die.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      the truth is that we are all just works in progress and that is okay.

  • http://www.3fourletterwords.blogspot.com Lindsey Goodall

    I lie to myself about what He himself has called me to do. . . being a writer. As if it was something I wanted to do? Hardly, I would have never dreamed that I would be trying to formulate sentences in my head and coming up with creative ways to express a thought. NEVER.

    The lies take full advantage of that lack of interest of doing anything cerebral. I tell myself that I have never been a writer, thus never actually will be, that I have no valuable content to offer, that nothing that comes out makes a bit of sense.

    And then someone . . . writes something like this . . . that reminds me that it’s through his Grace that I don’t need to have any real interest or skill or ability to fulfill this calling. If He has brought me on this journey, He will provide all I need to make it to the finish line.

    I KNOW that, I KNOW that, I KNOW that, but often times I don’t feel it.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      knowing and feeling are certainly two different beasts…

  • http://thoughtsaboutnothing.com @kylelreed

    the lie that I cannot get it done…that happens all the time.

    • http://twitter.com/BiancaJuarez Bianca Juarez

      Me too, Kyle. I feel you.

  • http://twitter.com/Jo_of_TSN Jo

    Lie: That if I didn’t win my parents’ approval, then I really was “useless.”

    Truth: That I’ve been blessed with every spiritual blessing, adopted as a “son,” been sealed with the Spirit, am a co-heir with Christ, and have been created to do good works. Though I strive for holiness, there’s One person whose approval I don’t need to win, and that’s good enough for me.

  • Danielle Kaczmarek

    Sheila, I couldn’t have read this post at a more timely moment. I just dropped my 2nd and 3rd grader off at school. As I drove home, I was tinking about the conversation I had last night with my 9 year old son. You see, their father is divoring me, so needless to say our days are rough. My son was crying last night and saying that he hates his life. It was heartbreakimg. I brought him into my bed and held him as we talked about all the things that are stressing him out these days. I wanted to tell him what I have told him many times throughout this horrible time, that God will see us through this. But for the first time ever, I couldn’t speak those words of comfort to him. I couldn’t speak them because I doubted the truth of it last night myself. I am battling the lie that God has forsaken me and my children because life has been hard for a long time. God gave me Jeremiah 29;11-14 and Joel 2:25 to keep in front of me as I go through this divorce. I keep tellimg myself that even though my husband broke his word, God never will. However, I am struggling to believe it these days. My kids need to believe that I believe it! ~Dani

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      easier said than done…but believe it because it is the Truth.

  • Ronda

    The lie that keeps coming back to me is that THIS failure will be the one that finally makes God turn away from me. That THIS time, he’s had enough and can’t use me any more.

  • BC

    The lie that I deal with regularly is: I’m invisible–no one would notice if I wasn’t here except my dog because no one would feed her.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      I have days where I am so appreciative of my dog’s dependence on me.

  • Peggy

    When things in life don’t unfold as we believe God is leading or in our time frame. I feel abandoned by God and he seems very silent.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Oooh, me too.

  • http://twitter.com/dvest Darrell Vesterfelt

    I am learning that most of the lies I am believing surround my identity. Neil T Anderson write extensively about our identity and his writing has shaped my life. When I believe the trust and promises God has give to me about my identity (security, significane and belonging) things are well for me. When I believes lies in these areas my life turns to hell.

    Thanks for the post it was encouraging.

  • http://slidingdownthestairs.blogspot.com Kristy

    The lie I seem to believe the most often, is that I’m not good enough. That I fail over and over, that it will never be enough, that I mess up over and over no matter how hard I try.

    Just recently, in the midst of one of those periods of despair brought on by believing all of those lies, God sent a coworker, an acquaintance, with a message for me: “God is pleased with you.” Because I knew that person had no knowledge of what I was thinking about, what was going on – I knew those were words straight from a loving Father who wanted to remind me that when he sees me, he doesn’t see my failures – he sees Christ.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      wow. what a story.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=841543388 Brenda Galliher McLean

    I find myself lonely in a crowd of people. The people can be those I have known for many years, most of my life or hardly at all… it doesn’t matter. I realize that part of this is due to my timidity, but I also hear the lies… “You’re so insignificant that no one even sees you…” “You have family that doesn’t even love or respect you…” “Being thousands of miles from those you grew up with and know you best doesn’t mean that even though you think about them, they remember you…” “Family??? You want a family out of the friendships you have created??? Seriously??? That’s not going to happen. These people already have families and you’ll never fit in. You will always be the “odd woman out”… ” I think the hardest part of hearing these lies, and tending to believe them, is that I hear them when I’m with people that I love and respect and consider extended family. It makes you actually question who you are as a person and as a child of God. You feel that you’ll never be good enough for anyone, and it’s very easy to believe. I struggle with this often and I have to go back to God, apologize for leaving Him out of the mix (because I KNOW He loves me- regardless) and ask Him to change my thoughts to what is true, not what I perceive as truth. I tend to struggle with this much more than I care to admit, but I also have a peace in God that allows me to believe that HE loves me, and that’s all I really need. Right???

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Right.

  • http://learningfromsophie.com/ Laura Anne

    And so I have a confession. I misread your statement about Sheila, and thought ‘Oh my word! Sheila’s pregnant!!!!!!!!!’

    Until I realised you said ‘poignant’.

    Oops.

    I really struggle in church feeling like I don’t live up to the expectations and certainly don’t fit in. I don’t have the pretty clothes, the nice haircut or the gracious temperament of a nice Christian lassie! I have to remember that God made me to be me, and not to fit in & be the same as everybody else.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Funny! The part about poignant….pregnant.

      Not about not living up to expectations. I get that.

  • http://twitter.com/#!/Micheledidasko Michele

    Probably the biggest lie in my mind most often is about abandonment. Because of childhood vicitimization and some recent trauma, I don’t trust God to protect me. This causes paralyzing fear and anguish especially because I froze (PTSD) during the recent trauma when I couldn’t protect the one I loved, and I know I can’t always protect myself because there is evil and pain in this world. So if I can’t trust God and I’m not able, I am faced with vulnerability & pain and that is not an option I can deal with.

    So I have to remind myself that God is always with me, and that he is in full control. To make that fit with the fact he allowed the traumas, I have had to rethink my understanding of Protector. God has given me some pieces recently that are hard to take, but will likely be key to healing and trusting Him. Still working on that…

  • Makeda

    Thank you for this post and these very timely words. The lie I believe more times than not is that I am not enough. not good enough, smart enough, young enough, pretty enough….the list is endless. The profound sense of unworthiness that sometimes threatens to swallow me whole is something I am actively working to resist. The Father has been gracious to me during this time. He is helping me learn to rest in the truth of His Word. I want to say believing the lies isn’t easy but the truth is, it’s way too easy. Thanks for sharing.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Seems like we all struggle with that one.

  • http://www.confessionsofalegalist.com Jeremy Statton

    The lie that I have often believed in the past is that God doesn’t really love me. After all, how could he? I am not that loveable. When this lie pops up I remind myself of the parable of the prodigal son and try to picture God standing there with his arms outstretched ready to hug me.

  • http://www.thestubbornservant.com Nicole

    I think the lie that slips into my thinking is “your life won’t matter.” I think what that really means is “your life won’t matter to that many” rather than “your life won’t matter to God.” It’s a small but significant difference, and when I find myself headed down that road, I try to remember that “what good is it to gain the whole world and forfeit your soul”…and that God truly has my best interests in his divine plan.

  • www.therextras.com

    The lie I say to myself is that I have to do it all by myself. In reality, He walks beside me, my constant aid, grace for the asking.
    Barbara

  • Hannah

    I often find myself thinking, “No one really likes me.” This has been such an trick of satan’s since the time I was in elementary school. Thankfully, by the grace of God I now recognize when this is happening and am able to pray about it and give it to God.

    Wonderful post!

    Hannah

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  • Thetennants

    The lie – I am not worth it
    The Truth – The Holy Spirit is a willing participant in my pain and WE will find a way out. That is something to Praise Him for!