The Counselor

Today I am guest posting over at Deeper Story, Tales of Christ and Culture. It is an incredible collection of intimate stories from some of my favorite bloggers. Go check it out, and get lost. I am honored that they are allowing me to share from time to time.

A couple of months ago at the encouragement of some dear friends, I started seeing a counselor. In seasons past, I have gone to talk through a particular issue, to get unstuck, to patch up the tears in my heart. This was different. There were no major problems. My life was fine. I just wanted to better understand how I see myself. Because perhaps deep down there are some lies that I tell myself about who I am and what I can do. Lies that hold me back.

But as these things go, as you will read in my story, issues quickly arose. And even though it might not always be fun, it is always a gift. I feel so fortunate have a safe place to process. A safe place without expectation, without pretense, without judgment.

I woke up with so many excuses. The roads were still slick from Wednesday ‘s snow. I hadn’t been in the office since Monday. I had a handful of safe friends who lent an ear, and an opinion or two, as I recounted backwards and forwards my latest dilemma. I was talked out. And most importantly, I was fine.

I texted her hoping to give her the out I so desperately wanted.

“Are we still on for this morning?”

Click here to read the rest of the post.

Do you go to a counselor? How have they impacted you?

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Lindsey has a sincere love for her precious dogs Molly and Maisy, a good red wine and the Delta Sky Club.

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • law, girl.

    i was raised in a family full of ministers who were born of ministers and they also birthed ministers.

    and (because of this?) my counselor is hands-down the singlemost person god has used to change my life. i have had both ‘christian counselors’ and my counselor who is a christian – BIG (HUGE) difference.

    i’ve been with her since 2004 and it’s the single-best investment i’ve made into my life. no matter what your issues are, i don’t see how anyone can’t benefit from working through life with someone who is trained (certified, educated – not just a recipient of an online degree, ahem) to do that with you.

    hooray therapy!


  • Lindsey, thank you for the heart and authenticity of this post. I often think seeing a counselor in our Christian subculture (and then talking about it!) is such a difficult, yet extremely freeing process that everyone should go through. Whether your game of Jenga is sturdy, teetering or sprawled out all over the floor in a crash that made the elderly couple jump from two tables over.

    • So appreciate the Jenga analogy. 🙂

      • Maybe they should start including Jenga in counseling sessions…Sure anxiety and panic attacks would shoot through the roof, but at least there would be Jenga 🙂

  • A counselor helped me break through at my lowest point last year when I was circling the drain. If it wasn’t for his perspective, I wouldn’t be here.

  • Thank you Lindsey.

    It’s hard, so very hard, to admit that it’s not fine. I struggle with that regularly. I still don’t deal with it to well.

    I think sometimes having a listening ear is all a person really needs.

    The hardest part is remembering God’s ears are always listening, waiting patiently for me to open up.

  • Hi Lindsey – I have gone to a therapist who is a christian (really like that distinction from “christian therapist/counselor) since 2004 and it has been the most life defining process for me second only to committing my life to Christ. And I believe Christ has used my time in therapy as a place of healing and refinement. Therapy, for me, has been a tool the Lord has used to redeem me/my heart on so many levels. I have wanted to talk more openly about this on my own blog and have not yet gotten there. I am not sure what is holding me back because face to face I am very open about it. Anyway, I am glad you posted about this. I have read your blog for a while just not a big commenter on blogs in general. But thanks for posting, you’ve given me courage to consider sharing my own story a little more than I already do.

  • Sharon O

    Yes I have been in counseling off and on for over 20 years. I feel it is just as important as going to the dentist or going in for a physical. Our souls need care too and when our hearts hurt our bodies hurt. It is a great gift to give yourself if you find a ‘great’ counselor and friend who will be honest with you and help you grow at your pace.

  • Yes, in fact I am in counseling right now.

    I am on the opposite end of this spectrum that I know, and have admitted for awhile now, that I have been angry for far too long; and many people [who really know me] knew it too namely because I would always be depressed around them. Depression is nothing more than inverted anger, and it is another way to cover up the anger felt – and very recently it is coming out that my anger is in response to the shame I feel deep within (and the shame goes deep…very, very deep).

    Counselors are the mechanics of the human psyche – and I am on a journey in school to be a counselor; and in the process of having someone dig deeper to help me get to my roots so as to deal with my own junk…I am learning how to dig as well. I am grateful for counselors – and especially for the very woman God sent me in my life at this time.

  • Ceramic Insulating Paint

    It is very hard for most people me included to admit they are not ok. That everything is not fine and they have no idea what to do next or where to go from here. It is nice to know that you do have a safe place to take to someone who will not judge you but will help you figure it out no matter what the situation is.

  • I just started seeing a counselor a few weeks ago. It has taken me years to work up the courage to start this process because I didn’t want to admit that I wasn’t as on top of things as I thought I should be. In fact, I still haven’t told more than a handful of people that I’ve even started therapy. Already the impact has been a good one…allowing me to set some boundaries that I was afraid to set before.