The Hardest Part About Moving

Posted By on Sep 18, 2011 in The Life I Live | 62 comments


I left Nashville four weeks ago today. And my transition for the most part has been surprisingly smooth.

That doesn’t mean that I don’t have mornings, like this one, where I wake up aching to turn the clock back four weeks and relish in a place that I know and that I feel known.

That is the hardest part about moving…the constant uncertainty. That everything, and I mean everything, is new.

Don’t get me wrong, I love exploring. I love meeting new people. And I love an adventure.

But there are days when I just want to know the fastest way to get from point A to point B. There are days when I just want to be able to stroll into church on Sunday morning and see more friends than strangers. There are days when I just want to savor old routines instead of going through the hassle of establishing new ones. And mostly there are days, when I just want to know and be known.

Have you moved? What did you think was the hardest part?

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  • http://www.thistreasuredlife.com Amy D.

    I have never moved and honestly, I imagine it would be just like how you are feeling. 

  • Anonymous

    Yes, I was born in raised in the State of Washington. I went to Michigan State and live in Chicago, Minneapolis,  Los Angeles and 7 years ago back to Seatatle.  Each time it was an adjustment.  Routines are fantastic and give us a sense of security.  Forming new ones – UGH!  

    I’m in the process of buying house and will move in 3 weeks. Although I’m moving 5 miles away, it’s still going to change my daily routines – new gym, different grocery stores etc…  

    Hardest part big moves is finding the new doctor, dentists, hairdresser, church and new friends.  I think with Google and Google Maps, learning a new town is much easier. 

    In smaller moves, the hard part is  just creating new routines. 

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Seriously I have no idea what we did before iPhones and GPSs…

  • Ingrid

    Yes! We moved a couple months ago and I must say a yes & amen to all of this. Especially the desire to know and be known- I think I miss that the most (my kids too)

  • Tam

    Oh, friend…I SO get this. I know how to pray for you Lindsey.

    It will get easier. So they tell me :)

    Love you.

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Love you.

  • http://twitter.com/EricHolmy Eric Holmberg

    I’m almost in the same boat as you. My family moved about three weeks ago. We only moved about 50 miles, but we now live in a much bigger town. We know some about where things are and how to get around, but the worst part for me is the desire to know and be known, like you were talking about. It’s difficult to be in “familiar” territory and yet not know or be known. Praying for you!

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Thanks Eric. Good luck with your transition. I know it will come…it just takes time. 

  • Cass Comerford

    moved in May.  Hardest part – probably walking into a church and knowing that no one knows me enough to know that I really need a hug.  

    • Lindsey Nobles

      I understand that feeling too well. 

  • Cheryl

    I know this all too well. I moved from Montreal, Canada to Redding, Ca. Then Redding, Ca to Medford, Or a while ago. I still have moments like this but it does get a little easier. You probably notice it more if you tend to make friends few very close friends.

    Hang on there

  • http://www.leighkramer.com/ HopefulLeigh

    I can relate!  The hardest part is not knowing and being known.  Almost a year and a half in Nashville and I’m still figuring my way around town!   It’s easier than when I first moved but it takes time to be fully settled.  Now I can’t imagine living anywhere else.  My group of friends is strengthening but it’s not quite as cohesive as my pals back home.  I’m glad my best friend is around the corner because her presence kept me going on the hard days when I first arrived. 

    • Lindsey Nobles

      That’s awesome to have your best friend so close. 

  • http://louisianabride.blogspot.com/ Emily

    So funny you posted this. We moved back in June and while my camelion husband can handle anything it has been tough on me. Settling into a new church, new friends, new job, and new house feels so off. I miss the relationships I had built, and really miss being even farther away from my family. Amen to this whole post!

    • Lindsey Nobles

      It’s interesting how we all process things so differently. And neither reaction is right or wrong. :)

  • Brittany Matern

    I will let you know :) Miss you! xo

    • Lindsey Nobles

      It’s kind of nice to know that even though we are very far apart that we are doing this together. I am so proud of you!

  • http://thomasmarkzuniga.com TMZ

    I’ve moved several times, and each time has had a distinctly different flavor with different challenges to face. The first time was when I was 12 and my dad got a job promotion from Pennsylvania to Georgia. Relocating from extended family and friends to a totally new place was challenging in every sense for a 12-year-old like me. Then I moved away to college my first year and sorta had to learn to live on my own apart from mom and dad.

    Most recently I moved from Georgia to southern California where I REALLY had to learn how to live on my own apart from mom and dad. It’s definitely a challenge being so far away from old friends and family, but I’m also an adventure-seeker and that helps alleviate the hurt sometimes. Still, I can’t help feeling like I’m wandering through here as I don’t feel much sense of “home.” Makes me wonder where I’ll call “home” next…

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Totally get that…

  • http://twitter.com/joesheehan Joe Sheehan

    Nope, haven’t moved but about I’m about… from St Louis to Las Vegas. Couldn’t be 2 different cities, culturally. Thankfully, the move is only temporary (less than 1 year), but I’m still a bit anxious about it all, and I’ve still got lots and lots to do.

    Thanks for the insights.

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Someone should start a Moving Planner business. There are so many details to keep up with. It would be nice if you could outsource it ;)

  • andrea

    I feel just like you do, it was about 3 months ago that we moved and I still dream about our old home and wake up so homesick. The hardest part for me is realizing I didn’t appreciate people enough and should have taken more time to spend with them. I miss friends of course but I also miss those “almost friends” like the friend who I saw everytime I took the kids to the library but rarely talked to besides then or the familiar faces from around town.  And I miss having a routine. I’ve moved 4 times and it always takes me years before I really get into a routine.

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Maybe it’s just me but somehow those routines feel like they make us who we are…so when they change you have to reassess, “who am I?”

  • http://www.sherimackey.com Sheri Mackey

    downsizing the house by over 1500 sq ft…

  • http://www.sherimackey.com Sheri Mackey

    Hey Lindsey, We just moved to the LA area too. I have to say that downsizing our home has been the hardest part for me! We started our church hunt last week and that’s been tough too. BR Sheri

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Yeah, that can be a beast. One thing I have learned is that you have to stop looking for what you had in your last church and be open to what God might have for you now. 

  • http://twitter.com/anitashawaii Anita Mills

    I moved to Hawaii over a  year ago. I completely understand about wanting to know and be known. The hardest part for me has been being away from my parents, brothers, and also friends I’ve had for over 20 years. The missing for me hasn’t gotten any easier really. I keep praying that it will. 

  • http://twitter.com/laurenbrendel Lauren Brendel

    I moved to Northern Cali in January and it was the first place I moved without knowing anyone (Cali is the sixth state I’ve lived in). It took me almost three months before I stopped using my GPS but it has made me rely more on God and forced me to become more comfortable with being “alone.” I’ve now gone to the movies, out to dinner, dealt with car problems, etc. all by myself (all firsts for me) and I feel stronger and more independent for it.

    The hardest part is missing my family and close friends (all on the east coast) but I’ve gained some good friends through work and church. It is rough at first but it does get better! Blessings to you

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Thanks Lauren! You are right about becoming more self-reliant. Moving as a single person definitely makes you become more comfortable with alone. 

  • Jessi

    I totally understand where you’re coming from. My husband and I moved in June to a new ministry that we were being called to. Although we know this is where God was leading us, it’s still hard to not be sad about leaving family and friends back home.

  • http://www.livesimplylove.com Merritt | Live Simply Love

    Up until 11 years ago I had moved a ton. And then I stayed put for awhile. And two months ago my husband and I moved to Boulder, CO to be part of a church plant (and to live near the mountains!). This has been the easiest transition ever, probably partly because we did it together and partly because of the small church where we easily plugged in and are making new friends. Still, I miss my house in Dallas (though I don’t miss Dallas), I miss my sweet neighbors and their kids who I saw every day outside my window, I miss knowing where I’m going when I get in the car–and which direction is north (for some reason that seems harder here). 

    I’m also finding it hard to NOT fall into the same habits I had in a big city, like over-programming my life (doing everything I could to meet new people, hopeful for the ones who would eventually become the close friends). Someone else said it too, but I’m trying a different approach here – take the new friends I have and go deep with a few rather than shallow with many. 

    I grew up in California and spent 6 years in Orange County during and before college. I pray that you’ll quickly find those routines, soon feel at home, and still savor where you came from because missing it isn’t a bad thing! 

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Funny I spent my college years in Boulder. Beautiful town. With great food! 

      • http://www.livesimplylove.com Merritt | Live Simply Love

        You’re right about the beauty and great food! Sounds like you and I just switched places! :)

  • suzy

    Lindsay, we’ve made some big moves, too.  Long lives in LA and Chicago.  Then in ’08 we moved our family from Chicago to Grand Rapids and leaped into new jobs – and entirely new atmosphere, space, environment, culture, everything!  I quit a long career in agency management and have been wobbling through new vocations.  But it’s how I met you!   The leap of faith you took to get to LA is real.  And you’ll leap every day into new conversations.  It takes lots of encouragement and trust, and you have both.  I wish you the best and hope to meet again soon.  Enjoy LA.  Go find the view at the top of Blue Jay Way.
    Best to you….

    • Lindsey Nobles

      Thanks. I will check it out!

  • Missa

    I feel your pain. Since leaving my parents home at 18, I’ve moved 11 times in the last 13 years. Some of those have been rental moves, but I went from Houston to San Anonio, to Germany, to North Carolina, to Portland, OR and anticipate moving early next summer.
    I know what I’m going to say is by no stretch an original comment- but the challenges seem to change based on where I’m at in my life- those short moves can sometimes be more disruptive than the major moves. Meeting people is definitely tough- I’m a bit eccentric and a bit socially awkward, it usually takes anywhere from a year to 18 months to settle in a place. But sometimes my husband’s or kiddo’s struggles are at the top of the list. Sometimes, it’s the heartache of expecting certain blessings by being in a place and being disappointed. Certain moves have left me in a place of place of isolation, but the beauty about the absence of community is a restoration waiting to happen. Its hard to be apathetic, oblivious, or indifferent about how you live when you don’t have thrcomfort of a routine. Every time I moved before I was apart of my family- my intimacy with God took on ‘more’ authentic quality. With my family in the mix, its the same with them and God. Given that we move so, so often- it can be a little intense. But I am confident that wherever I go, it because God has set my feet there. I’ll be praying for you! May God bless that ache by drawing you close and letting you hear His heartbeat.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Thanks Missa!

  • http://www.adambuzard.com …adam

    I just moved to Nashville. I figured someone had to take your place. The hardest part of moving for me is finding my rhythm and I wrote about it here if you want to check it out. 

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      I’ll check it out. Enjoy my home. My church. My Chipotle. :)

      • http://www.adambuzard.com …adam

        Don’t worry, I have only been here 2 1/2 weeks and I have already done all those things :-)

  • Amanda Williams

    You are missed. And while part of me wishes you would just pack your stuff up and move back here already, the other part cannot wait to look back on this time with you a year from now and say, “Just LOOK what the Lord has done.”

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Your Etta pictures keep me going…seriously I think you are going to have to move to California so she can be a superstar. 

  • http://www.lindseelou.blogspot.com Lindsee

    Lindsey, although I didn’t completely pick up and relocate, I totally get you. I changed jobs and churches all within a month, and that’s saying a lot because I worked at my church. Thankfully, I found a new church body QUICKLY (Praise God for BCF) and am loving the new job, but it’s still new and I’m still surrounded by people I love and trying to transition slowly. Which means I am having to say no to old friends so I can get to know new church friends. It seems odd, but it’s a good thing. But you’re right, it’s just new. And new things take time. I hope you find your niche sooner than later!

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      And I know you are in great hands at BCF. Give my sweet friend Amanda a hug for me. :)

  • http://twitter.com/BiancaJuarez Bianca Juarez

    The hardest thing is actually putting things into boxes. I HATE putting things into boxes.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Because cardboard smells like barf? ;)

  • http://beautyinthestorm.blogspot.com Dionna

    I think the hardest part of moving is the arranging of things like – getting a drivers license, finding new doctors, hairdressers, etc. Those people and things that you need daily but take for granted when you’ve been around for awhile. 

    I love the newness and adventure of being in a new city. I think it’s almost harder after you’ve been there – say 6 months or a year and you’re familiar with things at that point but still don’t feel totally roped into friendships, etc. That’s when I can get impatient that things don’t move along quicker than I’d prefer.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Seriously all the arranging of things is exhausting {says the girl who spent 2 hours trying to pass a SMOG test today so I can get my CA car registration tomorrow} :)

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Praying for you to feel at home…even though we miss Nashville being your home.

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      You and me both. The picture you guys Sunday made me feel so loved and missed…and broke my heart. 

  • turner_bethany

    I hear you, Lindsey. My husband and I just moved south after growing up in Indiana all our lives. Everything you have written explains my feelings exactly. Transferring a whole life is not for the weak of heart. 

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      So true…

  • http://www.tnealtarver.wordpress.com TNeal

    I can say the best thing about moving is trimming down the clutter. The most difficult part of moving was learning a new culture (whether from Texas to Wisconsin or America to Russia).

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Yes, that is nice! And fixing mistakes you made in a past life :)

      • http://www.tnealtarver.wordpress.com TNeal

        Clean slate tempered with wisdom–another positive reason for a move. But rebuilding a life with new friends in a new place can be both exhilarating and daunting.

  • Jennie Allen

    I know exactly what you mean- it is like you want to go back to something familiar to rest from all the new but then you realize- this is home.

    Hardest part for me is always patience to let a new town become home.

    I am so free this week it hurts- so call me if you are running around town lost and want to chat!

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      Yeah, home becomes rather hard to define. 

    • http://lindseynobles.com Lindsey Nobles

      And I will call you this week… {can’t wait}

  • Ashley Williams

    I just want to know and be known.

    No truer words have ever been spoken, or blogged. After have lived in a place for 18 months, I wonder if it will ever get to how I felt with my community back in MO.

    I think you have to be SO *intentional* in a new place. Asking people to get coffee, hang out, invite you places, and then actually doing it, lol.

  • Joy Argow

    Hey Lindsey I moved back home to Australia last year from Nashville. I miss my friends and the awesome Nashville/ Franklin community so much. Coming back home after four years out of the country equals heaps of changes. Friends are not only married but have three or four kids. Everything just changes. It’s like starting again. It’s definitely exciting knowing God has brought me back… But still I can relate to your turning back the clock statement.

    All the best!

  • Shellie Kubicki

    I’ve been here (in CA- Bakersfield) about a week longer than you. Second move in 2 years. After being in the same HOUSE in Amarillo for 20 years! 

    The move 2 years ago to WA was humbling. Moving from 2300 sqft to 1500. And now just under 1300. We downsized. A lot. I will admit we do have a very full storage unit back in TX! Not ready to part with my dining room furniture, china, etc. And my husband’s sports memorabilia. Lots & lots!!We knew no one in Bakersfield. But, being in a 12-step program, I have met a bunch of people already. And my husband is meeting people through work. 
    I did tell my husband that this was it. For a while anyway!! It was exhausting because he had to be here the 1st of August to start work. Soonest movers could come was the 15th. It also meant I had to make the 1000 mile drive by myself. After 3 back surgeries, I don’t do so well in the car on road trips! Plus all that packing (the moving company packed most), loading down my car, and then unpacking! 
    One of these days, maybe we could meet for coffee (although I don’t really like coffee!). Haven’t been into LA in 4 years. We have a time share in Palm Desert. 
    And Happy Birthday! I’d tell you on twitter, but you unfollowed me when you purged & my tweets are protected. Follow a girl back when you get a chance?? 

  • http://www.gritandglory.com/ Alece

    THIS… this i get so deeply… i have lived this for several years straight now, and… ugh. just know i get it. and i’m praying you through…. 

    i love you, lind’z.

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