Can I be honest? Really honest?
If I had to use one word to describe my spiritual life right now I would use the word…begrudgingly.
I am following God…begrudgingly.
I am pursuing God…begrudgingly.
I am believing God is for me…begrudgingly.
My faith right now is envious. It is jealous. And it’s a little resentful.
My faith right now is reluctant. It is hesitant. And it’s a little averse.
I know. I know. Begrudingly is not the adverb that one wants to use when describing their spiritual journey. Heck, it’s certainly not the word I am chasing.
But maybe, just maybe, by shedding light on it, and calling a begrudge a begrudge, I can finally get to the bottom of what is going on with me and I can finally have an honest conversation with God.
What one word would you use to describe your spiritual journey right now?