Last week I had the opportunity to lead a breakout on influence at Echo Conference. I am not a very confident public speaker {read: I HATE it} and life has been a little NUTS lately so I opted to let my buddy and hero Stephen Brewster interview me. Josh Burns’ notes from the session are here. And this week I’ll be posting some additional thoughts on influence.

1. How do you define influence?

The definition of influence is

‘the capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or

produce effects on the actions, behavior, opinions, etc., of others.’

But I like John Maxwell’s definition which says, ‘Leadership is influence.’And the best part, you don’t have to be a “leader or person of influence” {sometimes those words trip me up} to be influential. Some of the most influential people in my life probably not even aware of the things they’ve taught me.

It’s interesting to think back at some of the influential people in my life. Some I have never even met. I’ve just read their books or heard them speak. Some I’ve only had brief impactful encounters with.

Someone that fits in that category is Jeff Shinabarger. I met Jeff a few years ago at Q Ideas {Q is an amazing place to meet and connect with some of the world’s best problem solvers}. We were seated at a table together and Jeff took the initiative to find out more about each person at the table – what they do, etc. When it got to be my turn and I proudly told him who I was and what I did. He stopped me in my tracks by asking me, “Do you feel like you are doing what you were created to do?” That’s a question that will make you stop and think.

Several of the greatest influencers in my life have just been people who showed up at the right time and asked great questions. They helped me find great answers in my own time.

Who is someone who has influenced you? Did they have a leadership position over you? What made their influence stand out? 

Yesterday, I packed up what was left of my life in California.

In between errands and goodbyes, I stole an hour with my friend Jennie {yes, I reposted a guest post I did for her yesterday} and her husband Zac. They like many, asked how my transition has been, what I’m leaving behind and what I took away from this season.

Unpacking it all with them, I could see God’s hand woven throughout my zig-zagging story {no one ever said He only works in straight lines and wants us to take the easiest route from point A to point B}. Thought I’d take the time to document as much for me as for those of you who choose to follow along.

How has the transition been? 

The transition has been good.

Peaceful.

Crazy but peaceful.

Candidly, I am pretty worn out and can not wait for the day when I get to get dressed by choosing clothes from a closet instead of a suitcase. I’ve been traveling A LOT. When I have been in Nashville, I’ve been fortunate to have an incredibly welcoming friend open her house to me and the pup and make sure we felt right at home.

The new job, well it’s perfect…perfect for me I mean. 

Most of my goodbyes were said weeks ago so I was surprised at the rush of emotions that tracked me down on this quick trip back to Orange County to close up shop. I suspect grief, joy, and fear will continue to sneak up on me from time to time. It’s just part of it, just part of transition.

What am I leaving behind? 

Dear friends. The good news is that it is really just a “see you later” instead of a “goodbye.” And in many cases trips to Nashville are already on the books. But I would be kidding myself to think that those relationships won’t evolve and that the distance won’t make doing life together day-in-and-day-out difficult.

The ocean and just-about-perfect weather. The good news is that I’ll get to visit from time to time and on those trips I’ll soak them up. {In the meantime, I’ll try to keep my complaining about the Nashville heat and humidity to a minimum.}

Fish tacos. No good news on this one folks!

 What did I take away from this season?  

Looking back, my time in California was…necessary. I didn’t know it at the time but it seems obvious now.

2011 was a tough year for me personally.

There was a lot of loss…aching loss. Moving away gave me distance and allowed me to enter a season of rest, reflection and ultimately restoration.

People say that time heals all wounds. I believe distance helps accelerate the healing process.

So hopefully sooner rather than later, I can settle back into Nashville, a world that I LOVE, with a joyful and expectant heart, stronger, more focused, and more equipped to tackle what God sets before me next.

What have you taken away from the season you are in? 

A year ago {almost to the day}, my friend Jennie asked me to share my thoughts on some word prompts. The post is below. Crazy how my answers still ring true and my words speak reassurance to me in this new season of change. {PS – Jennie is the real deal. You need to be reading her book and following her on her blog and twitter.}

Years ago I began following a passionate young woman on twitter and on her blog: lindseynobles.com. I appreciated her honest, wrestling spirit. Now I am so happy to call her friend. We met just as she was departing Thomas Nelson into new uncharted territory. I so admired her faith in this new step, I wanted you to be inspired too.

I threw Lindsey some words and asked to share a little about them in her own life.

More glimpses into the trip that left us all changed.

{Pictures by David Molnar, photographer extraordinaire. Go check out his stuff. Beg him to shoot for you. Grovel. It’s worth it.}

Thanks for joining us on the journey! 

And…It’s not too late to sponsor a child through Food for the Hungry.  

Have you been to Ethiopia? How has Africa changed you?

About a year and a half ago, I stepped into a journey, a journey of exploration, to learn everything I could about orphan care. I had heard the alarming statistics at Catalyst and felt a tug to be a part of the solution. Whatever that meant.

 I just want to know more about what options I have for helping alleviate the orphan crisis. We are called so clearly throughout scripture to care for orphans. And I want to know how.

I quickly discovered the issue was quite complicated, there are no easy answers, and that we will all have to come together to make a dent in this worldwide crisis. 

I have been to conference after conference, listening and wondering what my part is in this story. I haven’t felt the call to adopt, at least not now.

It wasn’t until I was in Ethiopia on Saturday that I knew. Through FH’s Orphan and Vulnerable Children and Child-Headed Households programs, I could impact the lives of orphans around the world.

We met a 17 year old boy, Bona, who lost both of his parents. While he had some distant relatives who could take him in, without the care of a mother and father he remained vulnerable. But FH stepped in and sheparded the boy. He is now first in his class, studying to take his 12th grade exams and dreaming of the day when he can be a doctor.

We met a 16 year old girl, Mehret, who lost both of her parents to AIDS. She is now responsible for caring for her brother Bedilu {11} and sister Lydia {14}. All three HIV-positive and have the added burden of fighting the stigmatization of those with the disease. Community members had shunned them but FH rushed to them, loved on them, provided food and clothing, offered them legal support for their inheritance, built them a lavatory attached to their house, and trained Mehret to be a hairdresser so she could help provide for her family.

FH might not be all about adoption.

But FH is all about orphan care.

At least the beautiful slice of it I’ve seen this trip.

{All pictures by David Molnar, the punniest photographer I know. Dude is pretty talented too. Go check out his stuff. }

The Acacia trees.

The bumpy van rides that fostered blogger bonding.

The only lake you can swim in in Ethiopia, Lake Langano. {The red color is from all the minerals not dirt.}

We dipped our feet in {so now we can say we ‘swam’ in Africa, using the term loosely of course}. But had to get a little crafty to get our shoes and socks back on. 

The fist bumps.

The dancing.

The laughter.

The smiles.

The relationships.

This trip has been amazing. What a great group of travel companions and African friends. Thanks for following along. More to come on Monday.

Today I met a child I sponsor through FH. His name is Kenenisa Negash Bune and he is 7 years old. Kenenisa lives in a rural community named Jido which is located in the Great Rift Valley, a community that because of its erratic rainfall {which we experienced firsthand} is one of the most food insecure areas in Ethiopia. The kids in Jido live in destitute conditions. Destitute conditions.

It was tough.

I have never seen anything like it. Ever.

While I have seen undeniable poverty, this was inescapable poverty. Everywhere you looked you saw kids with bright eyes and hopeful smiles, but kids that were obviously lacking the most basic of necessities. Many wore tattered t-shirts and well, nothing.

But that didn’t quelch their joy. Not an ounce of it.

They laughed. They danced. They sang. They fist-bumped {yeah, I just made fist-bump into a verb}. And they beamed with every second of attention and snap of camera.

It wasn’t us {let’s face it, we are a pretty rag-tag bunch at this point} that gave them the hope and the fortitude to combat their conditions and choose joy. It is what we represent. It is FH. It is the organization that walked alongside their community leaders and advocated for them. It is the organization that is ensuring that the kids in this community will be able to go to high school.

You see in September the first class of freshman will enter Jido High School. Previously any children who wanted to continue on with their schooling past the 8th grade had to go 27 km away, something that is both expensive and dangerous so few risked it. But not anymore, Kenenisa, his little sister, and his friends will have a high school to attend.

The community leaders in Jido credit FH. And they credit FH’s partners. People like you and me. But they quickly admit that there is more that needs to be done. Food remains scarce and their drinking water is unsafe.

One man said in closing, “God has made you to bring change here. Don’t leave us. Don’t forsake us.” Please join me in bringing change to the world, in bringing change to Ethiopia, in bringing change to Jido by sponsoring a child through Food for the Hungry. 

With every breath I breathe
With every song I sing
I want to shout it out
Lord I am listening
To every word You speak
I’ll go where You will lead
To love the least of these
My greatest offering – Spirit Speaks, All Sons & Daughters

Photos courtesy of David Molnar, Daniel White and my handy dandy iPhone.

Last summer I heard Brian Fikkert, one of the authors of When Helping Hurts: Alleviating Poverty Without Hurting the Poor…And Yourself, speak {his co-author Steve Corbett is a former regional director for FH}. During the session, Fikkert touched on the differences between relief and development. Here are a few notes I took from his talk

Development: The process of ongoing change that is moving people closer to being in right relationship with God, self, others, and the rest of creation. Development is not done to people or for people, but WITH people. The key dynamic is promoting an empowering process.

The vast majority of organizations do relief. Yet the vast majority of people in the world are in need of development. One reason organizations opt for relief work is that donors like quantitative, measurable, material things. Donors don’t typically want to hear about relationships. Once the relationships are in place, the rest is just the details.

Two Important Keys to Development: Avoid paternalism, habitually providing resources or assuming tasks a person can provide or do for themselves. Asset-Based Development – Identify what is there. Focus on what is there. Mobilize what is there.  Focuses on the capabilities, skills and resources of the person or community. For more notes from Fikkert’s session click here. 

The more I learn about Food for the Hungry‘s work in Ethiopia the more I understand that this is an organization that does things right. They do real development {the hard kind} and are working with people to transform lives and eradicate poverty.

Four Things I Appreciate About The Way FH Works:

FH’s work is child-focused. FH has a Child Focused Community Transformation model which means that it assesses the health of a community by looking at the health of the community’s children. While FH works throughout a community, the organization’s introduction and key interfaces is through the children.

FH believes in relationships. This is Abraham. He is an FH social worker who serves 200 children and their families. But he loves each one of them like they are his family. How do I know this? Because I heard one of the 200 children he serves {and their mother} say he was like a father and mother to them. A father and a mother to 200 kids. Now that is an important job. But it speaks to the level of intimacy FH has with the communities it works.

FH assesses the assets and needs of a community and implements programs to best meet their needs and maximize their strengths. Child sponsorship funding allows FH to be more holistic in their approach. Your sponsorship helps lift up an entire community. Today I heard about FH’s Reforestation, Agriculture, Advocacy, Education, Hygiene, Malaria & HIV/AIDS Education and Prevention, and Food Security Programs, all that help serve the needs of children in the communities in which it works. This is a school library that FH was instrumental is helping rebuild so children would have access to books.

And most importantly, FH empowers those in need. Today we met 13-year old Teresa that merits her FH sponsorship with giving her hope the future. One day, after she finishes school, she wants to be a doctor. When asked why others should sponsor kids through FH, she said because there are tons of kids in her community that deserve to have an education. And Teresa is right.

So please consider sponsoring a child through FH. It can make all the difference in the world not only for a child, but for its family, and its community. And if you let it, it will make all the difference in the world for you. 

Disclaimer: This post was written in Johannesburg after our simple travel plans that should have taken us from Nashville to Atlanta to Amsterdam to Addis Ababa got rerouted after delay after delay and we found ourselves making impromptu stops in Accra, Ghana, and Johannesburg, South Africa. Down side…missing a day in Ethiopia with Kristen, Alysa, Emily, and Paige and the sheer exhaustion and just plain dirtiness from 36+hours of travel. Up side…a lot of great bonding time with the Nashville crew {Daniel, Crystal, Alece, Alli, and David} and experiencing more of Africa than we could have ever imagined. So all that to say what follows might be a little cheesy, riddled with typos and doesn’t make much sense.

If there is one thing that God is teaching me this year, it is that too often I delude myself into thinking I am in control, that I know what is coming next, and that life needs to meet {or exceed} my expectations. These lies destroy my ability to trust in His plan and to live with a joyful expectancy.

One of the things I am most excited about as I travel to Addis Ababa and The Rift Valley of Ethiopia with the FH Bloggers is that my limited knowledge about the country I am visiting, the field work of Food for the Hungry, and my travel companions, has prohibited me from framing expectations. And without expectation, I  finally find myself sitting calmly, hopefully and faithfully in the hand the of God.

Tomorrow morning {Lord-willing}, I will wake up in Ethiopia and be amazed by a God who created the Heavens and the Earth, a God who moves mountains, and a God who hasn’t forgotten the children of Africa and certainly hasn’t forgotten me.

Stay tuned, friends. Adventure awaits.  

I’m listening to Toto as I write this post. Don’t judge me. It’s a great song. 

In 13 days, we leave for Africa. I know Africa might be old hat for some of you. But for me, it’s new. Brand new. A clean slate. What I know about Africa, I learned from Toto. And Sally Struthers. And National Geographic. And Bono. And most recently, from Food for the Hungry.

In 13 days, we leave for Africa. I am intentionally not asking a lot of questions about the place, or the trip, or the people. I don’t want to fill my head with any more images or statistics. I want to see. I want to feel. And I want to know Africa intimately.

In 13 days, we leave for Africa. I am pretty sure that this will be the trip where I fall in love. {No, not like that. Sorry, Bianca.} I already seriously crushing on FH {what everyone around here affectionately  calls Food for the Hungry.} But on this trip, I anticipate I am going to fall deeply, madly, and whole-heartedly in love with this organization. So I will go ahead and apologize, if I blush and gush and go on and on about the work we do. Please just promise to nod and act interested and I promise I will extend the same courtesy to you when your heart is stolen away from you.

In 13 days, we leave for Africa. I will be traveling with an incredible group of bloggers. Some are old friends. Some are new friends. But they are all, each and every one, worth following in their own right. Do yourself a favor and go spend some time to get to know Alece, Alli, Alysa, Kristen, Emily, David and Daniel.

In 13 days, we leave for Africa. Sponsor a child. Tell your friends. Add the below banner to your blog. Pray for us.  And please follow along on our journey. 

Where’s one place you’ve never been that you’d like to go?