Today’s post is from Bianca Juarez Olthoff. ‘B’ works for The A21 Campaign as the Chief Storyteller. And she is believes in me, and my dreams, even when I can’t believe in them myself. Bianca dreams and she dreams big.  I am immensely thankful Bianca and her husband Matt and how they have welcomed me into their life and their family. 

Read Bianca’s blog here. 

Follow her on twitter here.

In a pivotal moment of life, I had the opportunity to connect with a brilliant man who challenged my dreams, my aspirations, but more importantly, my fear. It went a little something like…

Me: I want to do [______________] and I can’t.

Him: What’s stopping you from doing it?

Me: I don’t know. I can’t explain it…

Him: I don’t know you well, but I can tell you know what it is. And I’m pushing you to articulate what’s holding you back.

Me: Okay, okay. I’m… I’m so… fearful.

Him: You’re fearful of being fearful?

Me: Yes.

Him: What’s the worst possible thing that could happen? What’s the worst case scenario? Lay it on me!

Me: I’m fearful of the consequences of following my heart and failing. I fear losing money on empty pipe dreams. I fear poverty. I fear inability to change what everyone seems to believe cannot. I fear failure and embarrassment and humiliation. I fear being a neglectful wife and poor step-mother and failing homemaker. I fear dreaming so big that I’m lost in the orbit of a universe outside of our galaxy… floating past the point of no return where I can’t come back and live a life I once did. But most of all, I fear the audacity of believing I can change the world and feeling ridiculous for believing I can.

Him: If all those things happen, are you still alive? Can you still dream? Will your family still love you? With all due respect Bianca, I don’t think your fear is of failure. No, your greatest fear is that you will succeed. And you don’t know what to do with that.

In pursuing the calling God puts in our life, what can fear kill? Everything. Fear will inhibit and thwart us from being the person we sense in our hearts we truly are. The one who is talented and compassionate and gifted. The one who is smart and logical and able. The one who is called and predestined and confirmed.

Me: What are you dreaming of? What is stopping you?

You: _______________ 

So, I’m sorry. Really sorry. I STILL owe you a post on my ever-evolving thoughts on Orphan Care. Tuesday, I promise. My only excuse is that I got about half way through a draft and then got sucked into the craziness that is Catalyst West.

Orange County was absolutely beautiful. I ate In-N-Out Burger twice. The speakers were wonderfully challenging. I met several new friends and reunited with a ton of old ones. Catalyst West is definitely worth the trip.

Oh, and I had the opportunity to sit down with Bianca Juarez and Brian Wurzell on Catalyst Backstage and talk about…well, I will let you watch and see for yourself. Stick with it and you will see me go from winter white to a brilliant shade of red.

Click here to watch.

Were you at Catalyst West or did you watch along online? If so, what were your highlights?

First off, let me apologize for completely disappearing for the last week or so. It was never my intention to be away so long. But man, Catalyst came with a big ‘ol bang and stole every ounce of my energy. Okay, that’s enough of that…

Last week I was in Atlanta, Georgia, for the Catalyst Conference. It was a complete whirlwind that stirred a lot of things, good and bad, inside of me. Candidly, I am still recovering and processing (if you’ve been around here before you know it takes me a long while to process). But I wanted to be sure to share My 10 Favorite Things About Catalyst 2010.

1. Digging deep with my Catalyst/3DM Coaching Group (Brian Wurzell, Bianca Juarez, coach extraordinaire Jo Saxton, Hillary DeMeo, and the “MIA” Kyle Zimmerman.) LOVE these people. So thankful that they are boldly speaking into this season of my life.

2. Learning from Francis Chan. The man truly is fired up about emulating the life of Jesus. Some might call him “radical” but it is clear he is just faithfully working to live out the word of God. He has me wondering if Jesus is truly more than my Savior, if He is my role model?

3. Joyfully belting out John Mark McMillan’s “How He Loves” with 13,000 of my closest friends. One of the best worship experiences of my life!

4. Learning from T.D. Jakes that we need to get on out of the “cor-ner.” That “people who play it safe are not leaders.” That “if you always do what you have always done, you will only be who you have always been.” That “you need to make yourself uncomfortable.”

5. Hearing John Ortberg. That man is one gifted communicator. His book, The Me I Want to Be, has profoundly affected the way I think. I am still processing a couple of things he said on grace.

“Transformation requires at least as much grace as salvation.”

“Grace is God doing anything in me that I can not do myself.”

6. Boohooing as I watched Jimmy (who broke my heart last year) meet his Compassion child.

7. Having Andy Stanley reframe the story of Jacob and Esau. I know this…I don’t want to trade my future, my calling, my legacy, for a “bowl of stew.”

8. Watching Michael Hyatt teach a roomful of eager participants about the importance of “Platform.” Such an engaging presentation…made me so proud to call him “boss.”

9. Debriefing at night with my Catalyst roomies Trish, Bianca, and Annie. And laughing so hard that I cry trying to figure out the techno-style-video-chat with Sarah and Keely.

10. Witnessing a human cannonball. I lie. Actually, I hated the human cannonball. All I could think about was how that poor man was going to die a gruesome death in front of 13,000 strangers. Thankfully he made it. This time.

Were you at Catalyst? What were your highlights? If not, what were you up to last week?

Earlier today my friend Bianca Juarez twittered,

“Yesterday I walked into Target and walked out under budget and ONLY with the things I needed. I deserve a hug, a cupcake, and a gold medal!”

She got dozens of responses congratulating her for this impressive feat. Because WE ALL KNOW it is practically impossible to walk out of Target with just the things on your shopping list.

There is always something else beckoning you as you walk down the aisles of this monstrous superstore, “Purchase me.” “You really do need me.” “I am such a great deal and you deserve something special.” “No one has to know that I am not what you came for.”

I fall every time. And as I watch the young checkout girl scan the bevy of unnecessary items that have accumulated in my basket, I cower in embarrassment and think, “this place has defeated me again.”

I walk out to my car and make a firm resolution not to put myself in this situation again. A grocery store or the dreaded Walmart will have to suffice until I can learn some semblance self-discipline. But a couple of weeks later I find myself back for another round. Or more accurately another beating.

Here’s what I want to know. What is the most ridiculous thing you have purchased at Target?

My answer is here (except I bought the oh-so-practical VHS version, watched it once because I HAD to see what happened to my favorite heroine, and now lies in a box somewhere collecting dust.

Today’s “How He Loves” post is from Bianca Juarez. Bianca Juarez is a fireball. A fireball. A fire ball. I don’t know when, if ever, I’ve encountered someone whose light shone as bright. I met Bianca briefly at Catalyst West and have loved keeping up with her online, but can’t wait to have some more face time.

Find her blog here.

And her twitter her.

How He loves us, oh how He loves us.

How He loves us so…

The plane creaked loudly as we ascended into the clouds for a two-hour flight back to Los Angeles. To the left of me a thin Japanese man with wire-rimmed glasses neatly placed his feet on top of his black slip-on shoes. To the right of me a young, Midwest guy wore his sunglasses inside the plane and ordered a BudLight before takeoff. I hate sitting in the middle seat, I said to myself as we reached cruising altitude.

The Japanese man smiled and slightly bowed his head, an action I knew indicated a greeting. I spoke the few Japanese phrases I knew. He spoke the few English phrases he knew. And, please don’t ask me why, I spoke louder and slower as if he was losing his hearing like all Americans do when speaking to foreigners.

The pilot came on the PA and interrupted our hand gestures and hilarious communication tactics to inform us we were approaching heavy turbulence. (more…)