I can’t believe that a week from today I will be going to Guatemala with Compassion International. One week. I am hopeful, excited, and more than a little nervous. Post-Guatemala I have one day at home before heading to Oregon for the Building Champions Experience. As you can imagine, it is going be  crazy trying to get out of town for essentially two weeks.

So…I am going to take a brief hiatus from blogging. I just feel compelled to be quiet, to prepare my heart, and to refuel my soul. Things that don’t necessarily come naturally to me.

Until Monday friends!

I have been thinking a lot about intuition.

in·tu·i·tion [in-too-ish-uhn, -tyoo-]
noun

1. direct perception of truth, fact, etc., independent of any reasoning process; immediate apprehension.
2. a fact, truth, etc., perceived in this way.
3. a keen and quick insight.
4. the quality or ability of having such direct perception or quick insight.

For years, I discounted it. Candidly I just didn’t see much use for it. And when I dared to rely on it, it failed me. Miserably.

But I am growing (maybe you could go so far as to say “maturing”? no, that’s probably a stretch) and learning to trust my intuition, my instinct, my gut, my whatever-you-want-to-call-it.

And surprisingly it is usually spot on.

Spot on.

How in tune are you to your intuition? Has your intuition lead you to make good choices…or bad?

I tend to be a control freak. (more control than freak hopefully)

Although I’ve always longed to be seen as carefree, spontaneous, even happy-go-lucky, I am more aptly described as responsible, steady, even predictable. Nothing scares me more than losing my sense of composure.

So it makes it quite interesting when I do things that force a loss of control like taking anesthesia.

I have only had a few small surgeries where general anesthesia was required but each time it has made me crazy. From when the IV is administered until I am “out” there is this gap of time where I wanted to control the process of losing control.

I still feel the same. Is this working?

This better be working because I don’t do pain well. At all.

Am I making sense?

Will I remember this moment? What about this one? And this one? And this one?

Suddenly the meds kick in and the next thing I know, I awake on “the other side” groggy yet mended, wondering what exactly I had missed.

If I am honest this is how I feel about my impending trip to Guatemala in two weeks with Compassion International. (Can we talk about how crazy that it is only 14 days away?)

I know that I am going to be changed. I know that seeing poverty firsthand and God at work is going to do a number on me. But I am fighting with every fiber of my being to limit the experience, to predict how I will feel, to know what God will say to me, and to control how I will respond.

And so this song by Hillsong United has become my prayer:

Take my life I lay it down
At the cross where I am found
All I have I give to You oh God

Take my hands and make them clean
Keep my heart in purity
That I may walk in all You have for me

Oh here I stand
Arms open wide
Oh I am Yours
And You are mine

Take my moments and my days
Let each breath that I take
Be ever only for You oh God

My whole life is Yours
I give it all
Surrendered to Your Name
And forever I will pray
Have Your way
Have Your way (Arms Open Wide)

Do you struggle with control? Will you take a minute to pray that I will be willing to let go and give up control?

Today I am guest posting on Mary DeMuth’s site. I absolutely love Mary’s heart for people. She is the ultimate encourager. And she is a beautiful writer. Her memoir Thin Places is a powerful look at moments in life when God comes near. Here is one of my “thin places.”

I know that God is always with me. Always with me. I do.

But there are times, brief moments, when He feels so near that the lines between heaven and earth are beautifully blurry.

Moments when I cease to exist. And He reigns over the cosmos…and my destiny. (Click here to read more…)

Today I’m guest posting over on (In)Courage. (In)Courage is one of the few blogs I get sent to my inbox every day. Some of my favorite writers, and friends, are regular contributors. And so I was extremely honored when they asked me to share something on the subject of Community for their anniversary.

Some people don’t get it.

They don’t get my fascination with communicating in 140 characters. They don’t get what compels me to expose my most intimate struggles, fears, and dreams on a blog. They don’t get my motivation for allowing strangers to become followers, and friends. (Click here to read more…)

Also be sure to check out today’s giveaway.

Sorry I’ve been a little “missing in action” around here. I just got back from what we have affectionately named “Cali-cation” where I spent 4 days immersed in fellowship with some wonderful friends.

It was a trip I will never forget. On Monday as I began the long process of saying goodbye, I kept waiting for someone to cue up Michael W. Smith’s “Friends are Friends Forever” so I could unleash the steady stream tears that were just a blink away (it always worked at summer camp).

Here are a few quick highlights:

Listening to Kass and Chad make BEAUTIFUL music as we lounged around Casa Markley.

Coming from behind and beating a competitive “Team California” at Taboo.

Eating freshly baked molasses cookies courtesy of Tam.

Watching Harry Connick Jr. do his thing with the LA Philharmonic on a perfect summer evening at the Hollywood Bowl.

Having the opportunity to pray with Britt Merrick for his family and his courageous daughter Daisy.

Tackling hard questions about life, purpose, and next steps over some delicious Broccoli Chicken Casserole.

Feeling challenged, but empowered, understood, accepted, and most importantly loved.

So…what is going on in your world?

PS – Will you join me in praying for Daisy and the Merrick family? Here is their story. They are standing so faithfully in the midst of a giant battle against cancer. Let’s stand with them.

As we get older it is tempting to abandon the qualities that make us endearing, approachable, raw, even human.

We want to seem mature. We want to seem wise.

But unfortunately most days we just seem jaded.

I have come to the conclusion that I would rather be…

Naive than Skeptical

Silly than Stiff

Gullible than Guarded

Reckless than Persnickety

Childlike than Sensible

Awkward than Slick

How about you?

My schedule is usually pretty hectic. I. Am. Always. On. The. Go.

Juggling work, friends, church, family, and other miscellaneous commitments is an arduous task.

So I love that over the last few months I have formed several little routines that are peppered throughout my calendar.

They keep me grounded. They keep me in community. They keep me on task. They provide structure in the chaos.

Here are just a handful:

Every Sunday, I go to church at Cross Point. After the last morning service, I head out for Mexican food with Justin and Trish Davis, their boys, and whatever stragglers we can pick up. I’m not quite sure how this tradition started but I love it. It is one of the highlights of my week.

Every Monday, I have a “lunch huddle” with our Thomas Nelson executive team. This meeting helps me stay connected to the team and keeps me aware of what everyone is working on.

Every Tuesday, I drive down to Franklin for “Campus” dinner at Pueblo Real. (Are you seeing the food theme here?) This evening is always filled with enlightening conversation, laughter, and good food. I am so thankful for this community and the investment that make in me each week.

Every other Monday night, my Cross Point small group convenes. It actually could be called a “minuscule” group. It is just a couple of close friends who get together to eat (yes, food again), dream, and talk lives, love, and God.

Once a month, I attend Thomas Nelson Business Reviews. The entire Thomas Nelson leadership gathers to talk about what is happening in their business unit. It always is an informative way to spend 4 hours.

What routines do you have? Do you appreciate the structure they provide?

Saturday morning I flew out to sunny Southern California. I had been looking for a great excuse to escape the oppressive Tennessee heat and this really cool opportunity (more about that later) popped up at the last minutes to spend a couple of days with friends in Cali-forn-ia.  How could I say no to that?

So…

After several hours in the sky, I landed at John Wayne International Airport and a perfect day ensued.

I lingered over a LONG girly brunch with Bianca and Anne.

I got a haircut. And by cut, I mean CUT. (see exhibit A above)

I went to Mariner’s Church to see my friend Kyle Zimmerman lead worship.

And I heard a powerful message from Jeff Pries that felt like it was a not so subtle nudging,

“Lindsey, here’s how you deal with your terrible tally problem.”

Jeff said that a good relationship is one where people know their feelings (even the deep, dark, scary ones) and communicate them in humility and love.

He said that there is ALWAYS a gap in relationships between expectation and reality. And he said that you have to make a choice.

You have to choose whether you are going to expect the worst OR believe the best.

I am ready to make that choice.

I want to be someone who chooses recklessly, boldly, even naively, to believe the best.

I want to be someone who loves awkwardly.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and IT KEEPS NO RECORD OF BEING WRONGED. It does not rejoice in injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is awkward.

How was your weekend?

PS – Here’s a link to watch the complete message.

Have you ever wanted to go behind the scenes with today’s top Christian leaders?

I know that I have.

Now we can.

Each month Backstage Leadership participants will have the opportunity to ask amazing leaders like Francis Chan and Dan Cathy any question we want. (That is right…any. question. we. want.)

But, the learning process does not end there. Backstage Leadership not only gives us access to the information but it helps us get to the application.  Each month, coaches help participants find ways to apply what they are learning and provide much needed accountability.

The speakers for 2010 speakers include Francis Chan, Wess Stafford (Compassion International), Jud Wilhite, Scott Belsky, Mark Batterson, Pete Wilson, Jon Acuff (Stuff Christians Like) and more.